Pep Talk Time
I think this is an important discussion to have.
As a very single person I do understand why some people tend to be scared of being alone. In reality it isn't scary, it is an adventure.
I feel there is an unrealistic ideal for people in their 20's to have a significant other, but this is our time to find ourselves as cliche as that is.
I have been very single for over a year now and I have learnt more about myself in that year than I had in the 22 years prior.
If you are newly coming out of a relationship here are some of my thoughts:
Being on your own allows independence which I think might scare people as well, but isn't that great saying.. "do one thing that scares you every day", then if being alone is the scary thing then to do everyday. Remember that there will always be someone there for you when you need it be it family or friends, someone will be there to catch you if you fall.
Don't search for "the one", you aren't going to find it. If you become single and feel you need to find a replacement to the emptiness, that won't work. Filling the void with someone new will work for a time but in the long run it won't help, it will just confuse you and make you feel worse than you did before.
Letting your sadness and regret swell for the end of a relationship won't help either... yes wallow and feel the pain because if you try to ignore it, it will build up and explode (I tried that and it DID NOT work at all). You survived without that person before you met them and you can survive without them again, remember you have people who love and care for you.
Now a shout out to all the babes that have been killing the single game for awhile!
I mean the people that might date a bit but not trying to find the one true love because most times these are the kinds of people that realizes that you will stumble upon someone when you least expect it. This is to the ones that are completely empowered to be their own person, the ones who want to strive to greatness and don't need a S.O there.
These people have figured out what makes them as an individual happy could be fitness, knitting, writing, baking, check D for all of the above? Finding the thing(s) that make you smile and go to bed happy are the things you need to have in your life.
PEP TALK TIME:
I'm not usually a huge motivation person but lately I feel that everyone can be a badass human, you just have to find what makes you so awesome! You can be alone because in reality you won't be alone with your support system, they will make sure of that. I was lucky when I felt my world crumbling around me I had support from every direction. It took a while for me to understand though that these people love me and want me happy. At the time I didn't believe in myself and that is the kicker, you CAN do anything. You have the ability to be anyone you want to be, you just need to figure out what it takes to get there and with a little push maybe you can be the ideal version of yourself in the flesh, isn't that amazing?
Nobody needs a relationship, they are great but being on your own allows you to feel and understand YOUR needs and wants without worry about someone else, this is important. I know that a reason for my breakup was that I had too much anxiety and he couldn't handle me anymore, I get it I was too much or too much work, however its worded its bullshit. If someone cares they will find a way to manage/handle/take care of you.
So, just remember "everything happens for a reason" and you can get through it, being single isn't the end of the world.
Lots of love
-Cait xx
As a very single person I do understand why some people tend to be scared of being alone. In reality it isn't scary, it is an adventure.
I feel there is an unrealistic ideal for people in their 20's to have a significant other, but this is our time to find ourselves as cliche as that is.
I have been very single for over a year now and I have learnt more about myself in that year than I had in the 22 years prior.
If you are newly coming out of a relationship here are some of my thoughts:
Being on your own allows independence which I think might scare people as well, but isn't that great saying.. "do one thing that scares you every day", then if being alone is the scary thing then to do everyday. Remember that there will always be someone there for you when you need it be it family or friends, someone will be there to catch you if you fall.
Don't search for "the one", you aren't going to find it. If you become single and feel you need to find a replacement to the emptiness, that won't work. Filling the void with someone new will work for a time but in the long run it won't help, it will just confuse you and make you feel worse than you did before.
Letting your sadness and regret swell for the end of a relationship won't help either... yes wallow and feel the pain because if you try to ignore it, it will build up and explode (I tried that and it DID NOT work at all). You survived without that person before you met them and you can survive without them again, remember you have people who love and care for you.
Now a shout out to all the babes that have been killing the single game for awhile!
I mean the people that might date a bit but not trying to find the one true love because most times these are the kinds of people that realizes that you will stumble upon someone when you least expect it. This is to the ones that are completely empowered to be their own person, the ones who want to strive to greatness and don't need a S.O there.
These people have figured out what makes them as an individual happy could be fitness, knitting, writing, baking, check D for all of the above? Finding the thing(s) that make you smile and go to bed happy are the things you need to have in your life.
PEP TALK TIME:
I'm not usually a huge motivation person but lately I feel that everyone can be a badass human, you just have to find what makes you so awesome! You can be alone because in reality you won't be alone with your support system, they will make sure of that. I was lucky when I felt my world crumbling around me I had support from every direction. It took a while for me to understand though that these people love me and want me happy. At the time I didn't believe in myself and that is the kicker, you CAN do anything. You have the ability to be anyone you want to be, you just need to figure out what it takes to get there and with a little push maybe you can be the ideal version of yourself in the flesh, isn't that amazing?
Nobody needs a relationship, they are great but being on your own allows you to feel and understand YOUR needs and wants without worry about someone else, this is important. I know that a reason for my breakup was that I had too much anxiety and he couldn't handle me anymore, I get it I was too much or too much work, however its worded its bullshit. If someone cares they will find a way to manage/handle/take care of you.
Lots of love
-Cait xx
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